I call him Doctor Mom
Deeps found me parked on the couch yesterday. I wasn’t dressed. I was wrapped in several blankets. And I probably smelled.

Deeps: What are you watching?
Me: Something stupid.
Deeps: Like?
Me: See that woman? She works for the phone company and she’s an aerobics instructor. And she’s been possessed by a ninja.
Deeps: A ninja?
Me: Yep.
Deeps: Wow.
Me: I know.
Deeps: So why are you watching this?
Me: No reason.
(beat)
Deeps: What’s wrong with you?
Me: Nothing.
Deeps: Something is wrong with you. You only watch stuff like this when you’re sick.
Me: I’m fine.
Deeps: What’s wrong?
Me: Well, my throat is a little sore.
Deeps: I knew it!

So Columbo beat it out of me - he doesn't even check for a fever. He just checks the remote control. Whatever. So I’ve got a stupid cold. Stupid. Cold. Stupid.

Now that I’m contaminated the computer keyboard, I’m going back to bed.

Labels: 2006